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QUARANTINE BLUES

Is this a flu epidemic or a Zombie apocalypse? Honestly, it feels more like the last one. 

Streets are empty, stores are empty or closed – even on Saturday nights. It’s a sad thing to see, but at the same time a good thing cause that means people are respecting the communities new regulations and restrictions. I’m not the most social person in the world, something that has changed over the years as I used to be highly active when it comes to socializing. So I never thought that this temporary quarantine was gonna affect me that  much. I go to work, do some errands after work, go home make dinner, clean the apartment a bit and then tend to my hobbies. And my hobbies are mostly Netflix, social media, gaming or youtube/twitch content creation. So my hobbies can mostly be entertained from the couch or my gaming chair.

But as the weeks have gone by, I can slowly feel how my sanity is draining. Not being able to see my friends, my parents or even really browse in stores and chat with shop personnel. It’s so strange! I’m at a point where I go to the store and suppress a cough because I’m scared I will be kicked out of the store, haha! So my days are now spent even more on the couch with wine and premade salads. I cook a lot of food, I catch up on all my television series and I’m gaming till I am dead tired of it. Normally when I start feeling tired and lonely like this, I call a friend and we meet up for a lunch, glass of wine or a good cup of coffee. But not today. Or next week. Or even next month?? That’s the most draining part about this whole thing, we have no idea when the quarantine will end! I never thought in my lifetime I would ever experience such expreme precautions due to a flu epidemic like the Corona virus. Feels surreal.

So I do what I can best these days, I focus on my Youtube content creation hobby. I can’t remember last I actually made so much food as a do these days from scratch. I am very lucky to get the groceries and recipe for dinners delivered at my door, which makes things alot easier these days. But I was very unlucky to ruin 2 of my recordings, one after the other due to audio malfunctions. And suffering from quarantine blues like I do these days I actually started crying from pure frustration, ouuff! My head was screaming “if i cant even to this right, then what the hell do I have left??” Stupid way of thinking, but my mind can go to dark places when I’m all out of happiness hormones. I’ve just been sick a lot lately after my surgery, one illness after the other. Then I finally start to feel better and we are all isolating ourselves due to current situations of the flu. The stupid thing about this is that THINGS COULD BE SO MUCH WORSE. So I feel bad even complaining about it! But my reality is my reality, and I’m just at a point where I feel like venting.

 

The good thing about all this is that I have had loads of time to network around my youtube community, plan out my videos and improvents I can do. And i finally reach my first 100 subscribers on youtube! 10% of my current goal of getting monotized is reached, and that is a nice surprise in all this! More about this topic in an upcoming blog post. I hope you all are being safe, and doing at least OK in all of this. Things could definitely be worse, no doubt! My boyfriend got laid of temporarily in all this, we are hoping things will turn for the better within a month, but who knows? Fortunately my job is safe in all this, so I think we will be alright.

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WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS

Hello everyone! I’m finally back at work and everyday life is back in order. Is it a very noticeable sign that I’m getting older, as I’m getting more and more opposed to changes and non-routine stuff? :p I just love knowing I don’t have any major meetings at work one week, no special plans for the weekend – just loads of spare time to do WHAT EVER I want! (usually eat and play games, hehe.. )

Last week I was out having dinner with a girlfriend and watched a stand up comedy show which was really nice, celebrating her birthday! I really need to get out more, and it was lovely to laugh so much. I actually bought tickets for another show for me and my boyfriend, and when the Easter week vacation comes my cousin is visiting and we will head out on the town for some drinks! I am really looking forward to that. Sometimes I use too much time on my computer recording, editing and playing games.

My energy how ever have been kinda low this last week and I hate how strickt I am with myself when that happens. I sometimes struggle with anxiety and its not really an everyday problem, but just really annoying. And the anxiety usually gets triggered when I have a plan in my head of what I am SUPPOSED to do, but don’t have the energy to complete. And the sad part about that is that the agenda I have planned out usually isn’t something that I HAVE to do for the day to go around. Usually it’s like smaller things, like doing Twitch/Youtube content, cleaning out extra stuff in the apartment (drawers etc), going to IKEA to buy a food bowl, going to the postoffice to pick up a package etc. I just dont understand why I am so harsh with myself, griefing over the small things when I should just be relaxing!

But it is worth mentioning that anxiety attacks usually come from overthinking situations, and that is not always easy to control. There are even times i get anxiety without not really knowing the reason. Fortunatly my anxiety attacks are getting more and more rare, so it’s not really a big worry. But I have heard that once you suffer from it, it doesn’t always go 100% away, it’s just something one has to get used to.

Peace out, I hope you had a good weekend!

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Post Surgery

I’m Alive!!!

Last week I had surgery due to a cyste on my ovaries, and it is FINALLY gone! That cyste lived so long with me that I even chose to name him Bob. Bye, Bob.

The surgery went well, but my energy levels have been quite drained so it has been good relaxing on the couch and watching loads of Youtube videos. I have also had time to focus a little on self beauty, so I went to the hairdresser and cut my hair! Also got myself eyelash extensions and I am pretty happy with the result!

I am happy to see that my Youtube growth is going very well and steady. For each video I put out I get about 1-3 subscribers which I am very happy about. And I still enjoy making the content, and thats great! But I do have to say that I somewhat miss the Live interaction from Twitch streaming. So I really wanna try to get 1 stream in per week. Most importantly food/just chatting but I might change it up with some gameplay of League of Legends or a playthrough of an adventure Indie/platform game. It’s just that there are so many things I wanna do, and so little time. But I will try my best 🙂

 

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IT’S A NEW YEAR & GOAL TIME!

Happy new year! This year I kinda told myself that I would not do New Years resolutions,
but oh what the heck – that’s half the fun even if one do not follow them up xD 

I have a bad habit of making lists of everything I am going to do, what I should do, what I want to do AND what I might do. Phew! That goes without saying it can be pretty hectic and make more noise than order. So this year I wanted to do things differently and just skip that part. Buuuuut…. I LOVE MAKING LISTS! :p Anywho, I kinda realized that a small list might be needed just to get more order in my life. There are things I really wanna accomplish and without a plan it just won’t be done.

The new year started out as a very relaxing year, as I took a 2 week christmas break from work. I had loads of time to just relax and not stress about anything and I LOVED IT. Then it was back to work, and oh ma lawd things were busy. Work had piled up and there were work trips to be made and work courses to be completed. And when things get busy for me I sleep less to get time for my personal hobbies. When I don’t sleep well, I don’t perform well when it comes to my hobbies. So it turns into a circle of bad choices in general.

I’ve come to realize that I NEED my hobbies to feel happy, because my hobby is gaming and content creation – and content creation is so rewarding for me in many ways, as you learn so much about different platforms, algorithms, ways to work etc. It just really tickles my brain cells and I love that part :p So with this in mind there are some things I would like to use as a new years resolution and these are as follow:

1. PRIORITIZE YOUTUBE
One platform to rule them all! With consistent content. I’ve given blogging, instagram, snapchat, Twitter, Twitch and Youtube a good go – and personally Youtube (food content) gives me most in return. There are many reasons to this, but some worth mentioning are recording and editing instead of LIVE content – Work that is done once and grows over time when I am offline and the great tools to analyze the traffic, growth and comments. Secondary platforms for me will be Twitch for livestreaming games (and maybe food over time?), instagram for pictures and insta-stories, and lastly my blog for bigger texts and news. These platforms are very different in many ways, and that is what I love about it. Keeps me updated and current on different ways of communication in social medias and also gives me a variety of ways to be creative.

2. PRIORITIZE A SLEEP 
I work fulltime within IT and that work can get heavy at times. For me to be able to have energy to perform my hobbies in a representable way, I need to sleep more. I have a bad habit of only getting 5-6 hours of sleep per night and it just isn’t enough. I wanna up my game to 7-8 hours per night as it is such a gamechanger in my mood and energy. This means I need a sleep schedule and MAN it’s gonna be hard to stick to it! I feel very creative around midnight, and for this to work for me I need to be in bed around 22-23:00 every night. I think this will be the most difficult resolution on this list, to be honest.

3. HAVE A SCHEDULE
If i am going to be able to juggle between Youtube, Twitch, Insta and blog – I need to have an idea of when to do what. So I created a schedule for myself that I look forward to testing out. In general it says Twitch in weekdays, Youtube recordings in the weekend, and Wednesday + Friday is reserved for my boyfriend, serious gaming and WINE :p

So there you have it, my small but very specific list! I kinda wanted to add something about losing weight, exercising etc etc but let’s just start with something I actually believe I can stick to :p I just have a good feeling that if I actually manage to keep my 2. New Years resolution, then everything else might just fall into place.

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CHRISTMAS AND QUALITY TIME

Christmas is almost here! 

Wow, time goes fast! I don’t really own any christmas decorations, BUT my dad bought me this cute little christmas gnome that I got last year – I really love the design of it! But when christmas time was over last year, we never really bothered to take it back to storage… So this gnome has been a part of our family through out the whole year, so I guess he can stay for 1 more month! xD

So recently we hired a cleaning lady! OMG I love it! It’s so relaxing not having to think about dusting, extra cleaning and scrubbing the toilet. So once a month now as she cleans the apartment, my boyfriend and I go out for a romantic dinner together. Quality time! It really does wonders, being out without technology and just focusing on each other. Talking about things that are on our minds with work, hobbies and more. I always have this go to restaurant when we go out and I always enjoy eating Philly Steak! SO YUMMY!

Lately I’ve had more time to think about what I want to do with my personal time and hobbies. It started out with livestreaming on Twitch with gaming content, but over the time I have come to realized that this is not my biggest passion. I do love creating new friendships through the platform and find online friends to play with, but this is not a hobby I want to invest alot of time and effort in to grow. So I have been pondering about “Well what is my passion?” And the most straight forward thing I could think of was; FOOD! xD

So there are many ways to use food as a hobby, but lately I’ve been kinda hooked on this Youtube trend called Mukbang – which is a Eating Broadcast. This consists of Youtubers who film themselves while eating and talking to their viewers about their everyday life. Sometimes it’s takeaway, other times they cook in front of the camera. And I’m really digging that concept! That’s why I have been thinking about spending more time on Youtube ahead instead of Twitch. That doesn’t mean I will quit gamestreams entirely, but it will be less often. My plan is to create 1-2 recorded Mukbangs for Youtube each week. And I wanna try to upload consistently, just to see how far it can get me. Cause I think growth on Youtube is all about always adding new content, even if you still are kinda new to the game of what to bring to the table.

Lately I’ve updated some more on my stream/recording setup, including Mukbang equipment and lighting! My boyfriend doesn’t really see the charm of Mukbangs, but I love how supportive he is of my hobby regardless. We have very similar goals to how we see ourselves spending our spare time together but also seperatly. The fun thing about doing Mukbangs is all the great food I can eat, and also I’m getting better at fixing my hair and makeup, which always really cheers me up. It’s nice to have reasons to dress up again, without it including going out to a party. I’ve been experiencing with false lashes lately, and I think i finally found something that works for me. I will post a blog about it later, cause I already made a Youtube review of it!

So yeah, that’s my life these days. Work in weekdays and Mukbangs in the weekend! At the end of December I’m gonna have a 2 week vacation and I am looking sooo forward to it, I CAN’T WAIT! I haven’t really had a proper vacation this year as I changed jobs over the summer. I am not traveling this Christmas, but for the upcoming year I really need to travel somewhere dope with my boyfriend!

So that’s my little update for now, more when we are closer to Christmas time! 

 

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A bloggers Life

I have for a long time been thinking about starting a blog.

I used to blog many years ago and I did it surprisingly well. But back then it was under the blogname “Superpiiiiiiiiink”, so I guess it’s better to go by my new, online name Lana Meadows maybe? xD The previous blog contained loads of selfies, shopping haul & latest dinner pictures.

This time I will focus more on my branding but more from a personal point of view. Sometimes there are many things to be said about whats happening in the world of both gaming and content creation in general. I look forward to be able to write more in depth blogs about my thoughts about social media topics and also my personal life.

Now i have an excuse to use my camera more often too, and not only for food pictures 😉

I look forward to sharing with you guys!

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